I listen to it on low
And it is beautifully familiar
My coughing slows
And I can try to breathe
My head seeks to implode
And it's all so poetic
My lungs are clotted with death
And my throat is swollen with blood
You might as well give up hope for me
Because I don't care anymore
My thoughts are random
And the room is moving in melodic rhythm
The bricks are falling
And the quiet is calling
My soul is answering
But your hands are holding me back
Let go
Let go and I'll come back to you soon
The toss up is hopeless
And I can't see the outcome
It's so colourful
And it makes it's way across the room
Coming for me
It has today
Tell him
Tell him to take me before I care
Before I'm coherent and able to disengage
From the feeling of longing and love
I don't know where I'm going or when I'll be back
Please take care of them, you have to
They'll fall from me when I can't stand with them
They're to fragile to face the wind
My eyes flutter but it's all dark
You're screaming and crying but I can't see you
I see the vibrations in the room
The waves of despair rolling around in cloves
I have no time left to help you
You have to move on without me
You have to give a shit now
About other people
I gave you a chance to change
Now I'm forcing you
I can't be your crutch anymore
Now you have to grow up
The melodic waves of your crying are so soothing to my dying body
They make me sleepy
They make me tired
I'm delusional and you're sobbing in my ear
Whispering something in a language I can't understand anymore
You're saying something and I don't understand
It won't make sense later
I have to decipher it now
It has to make sense now
...
..
...
.... ..
...... .. .. .
... .
Dance with me love
I want to feel you in my arms once more
On that beach we were married on
Just on last time
What?
Dance?
I can't
There are no beaches where I am now
There are no soft breezes
No one to care for me
But there is the priest
He's muttering the last rights his sanity leads him to believe I would want to hear
But I don't
Care
About him
Or you
Or anyone
I'm finally going to die and no one is going to stop me
Not even you
Not even them
You may run a million miles but you will never find me
Not here
Not ever
I'm not within your reach
You'll never get me
You won't tie me down again
You won't leash me to the children I didn't want to have
You won't barricade me into the stupid brown house I didn't want
And you won't bury me into the grave you wanted for me
And you won't make me love you
You beautiful bastard
You can't make me love you
You can't make me love you
You can't